Turn A No Into A Yes

How often does it happen that people run your door in when you offer a new suggestion, when you ask for more or when you propose a different approach?

I’d suggest– not that often but don’t worry that’s normal.

We are all cautious especially these days when we have more access to information and choice and get bombarded with offers left, right and centre. And of course- our first response is nearly always “no”.  

And as much as we know it, getting a ‘no’ still can still be a hard pill to swallow which is often why we hold back to even ask for it and when we ask and get the rejection, we don’t take it any further.

But this is where the magic happens because a ‘No’ often means a ‘not yet’.

In this blog I’ll share with you 8 tips how to not only get over this fear and embrace rejection but also the practical steps to turn this obstacle into an opportunity.

When I got into recruitment for the first time and my manager back then said I should go through the database and call people to introduce myself and to ask for a meeting (which is always the start to get business), my heart started racing.

Not only do I hate (and that’s HATE with capital letters) phone calls but I also already anticipated what’s coming (simply because I always do the same thing: I hang up on people as quickly as I can because it’s annoying to be surprised with an offer especially when it’s unsolicited, you’re not in the market for it or simply – when you’re not in the right head space 

It’s a disruption and this is also why the old way of marketing doesn’t work anymore. Whilst back in the day, it was a pleasant distraction because not much else was going on, in this day an age where we constantly get ding this and notified that, we are quick to say ‘no thanks’.

This is what we have to keep in mind when we tackle this topic because a rejection most often has nothing to do with you but with the situation. An amazing insight that Leanne shared in our workshop a couple of weeks ago was:

Isolate the negatives

Generalise the positives

 

And the same goes for the situations you’ve been knocked back as it’s often those memories that keep us stuck where we are. 

However, being able to reframe a ‘no’ can actually create new opportunities when you see how you can benefit from this seemingly worst-case scenario.

Tip #1 – See it coming 

Rejection happens even to the best of us, so do yourself a favour and embrace it before it happens.

The more we hear no, the easier it is to handle and that brings us back to another great tip that Leanne gave last week – watch the Ted talk about 100 days of rejection. Simply asking for a better price in a store or trying to negotiate should become the norm and the mindset you approach everyday to make rejections more normal.

This leads us into tip 2 which is how to respond to rejection.

Tip #2 – Detach from emotions

Over the years I’ve gotten more no’s than I could ever count. Do I always talk about it? 

I don’t. Because it’s part of the game. What I’ve come to realise over the years is getting knocked back, getting proposals rejected or ideas pushed back is often because the decision maker didn’t understand the idea, concept, product, service, or its benefits or how it would apply to them.

And this is something in my control that I can work on. 

So instead of being angry, upset or disappointed, the most important thing here to do is to ask for feedback. And I know - that requires a ton of courage to start with especially if you’re an introvert like me but let me tell you- this will often crystalise the real reason and gives you something you can address in future.

And also remember- it’s easier to say no rather than ‘I’m not sure’ or ‘I don’t trust you’ so it isn’t necessarily the wrong offer or solution but maybe also the wrong timing or wrong approach. Because it takes time to establish trust and if you haven’t laid the groundwork and provided enough information, context and social proof for your claim or ask, people are naturally more cautious.

Depending on what your decision makers says, you can even ask whether it’s possible for you to reach out in the future – for example, if you gain a specific skill set or more experience or add a new feature of package etc to your current offer. And this leads us into our next tip, tip #3: 

Tip #3 – Rethink Your Approach

If you get ‘no’ a lot, then maybe you’re doing something wrong.

Even if that’s the case, there’s no need to panic, because you can fix your approach.

Go through your proposal or pitch or maybe even your marketing material aka your CV, LinkedIn profile etc. Also get some feedback from a trusted source to see if there’s something that should be improved or changed because it is so easy to have blind spots or be too close to see something others pick up straight away. 

Some of the pitfalls why your marketing material doesn’t cut it:

• It is too long and tedious or too short.

  Bear in mind that you’re dealing with busy professionals who don’t have the time to listen to your entire back story since day dot.

  Instead, focus on demonstrating how they can benefit from you and your point of difference. Make it specific to what you ask for and don’t add every education, experience and story that you’ve ever done or experienced. It’s distracting and confusing and as we know – confused minds don’t buy. 

• Your presentation isn’t cut through. 

  Now with more choice and with that, more competition than ever before, having an appealing design of your pitch deck, CV or proposal can make or break the deal.

  I can tell you that on some days in my recruitment time, I got up to 500 CVs a day which means that I could only spend a few seconds on each. So if I didn’t see the right information quickly and easily (which is also part of the design), I often didn’t even read it further. I’m sure I missed a few outstanding candidates because of that but agin- being the best without others knowing it or being able to pick up on it because of your bad marketing, is just what’s part of today’s world we are in. You only have a few seconds to make a good impression so make them count. We have access to incredible design tools like Canva & Co – so there is no excuse to not use it.

• It isn’t different enough

  Everyone has more choice and competition so being better isn’t good enough anymore. Being different is the key here and no – that isn’t the same as nailing the design.

  It is related to your biggest differentiator and asset you have to make it your competitive advantage: it’s your story.

  It is connecting the dots of your background to where you were to where you are now to – and now here is the most important part – how you can use this to benefit your decision maker if you go for a role or pitch for an investment. There is the saying- no one cares about you until you care about them. Oldie but goodies because it’s so true.

Tip #4 – Don’t improvise. Practise.

The better you are prepared, the more confident you are and this is what often gets people on board and on to the ride with you. But if you’re stumbling over your words, you aren’t able to answer common questions or contradict yourself in your story – this is where you’ve already most a major opportunity because people don’t trust you. 

Even if you’re a natural when it comes to giving a speech, there is always room for improvement.

For example, what I always do when I give a keynote or run a workshop – I say it out loud a few times so that it comes out without having to think about it too hard, I can say it in a conversational way but it is still polished because it’s practised.

I’m not relying on me coming up with something witty (so far, it has only happened like a handful of times that I could piggy back on speakers before me but you can’t rely on that as you never know what they are going to say and how you can jump on that.)

So I always think of a story- like how I met the event organiser or the person who hired me in the first place and bring them along the ride. I always connect it to the topic though to make it relevant and don’t just waffle on.

When I have nailed the first part, I then practise in front of the mirror to check on hand, facial and body gestures as your body language makes a massive difference, also when you present online. 

Last but not least, I usually rehearse the entire keynote or workshop when I’m swimming and do it a few times. For me, moving my body and not being distracted by calls or notifications helps me to focus on this one task intensely and makes me more confident for the actual delivery.

That doesn’t mean you have to do the exact same approach – it just means that you want to figure out what works for you to practise in advance so you can set yourself up for success and if there is a way you can combine the necessary with pleasure (like for me – swimming + rehearsing), it’s a double win).

Tip #5 – Tackle Objections Early

I didn’t know that this technique has actually been a very effective marketing method forever and two days and that I’ve used it many times throughout my career without knowing it had an actual name – it’s called objection based marketing.

What objection based marketing means is that you address potential concerns or worries before your counterpart or decision maker can do it.

The first time that it worked for me like a treat was when I wanted to get intro recruitment with zero industry experience nor professional background in a similar profession. I was in Brand & Product Marketing for 10 years prior to me switching and let me tell you – every agency I applied for picked up on that.

The one common rejection that I got, over and over – more precisely 16x times before I switched my approach – was: ‘you don’t have sales experience and we don’t think we can teach you either’.

So when I was invited to the very last agency that I could get into and had my interview with the GM on that day- I literally started the meeting with:

‘I know I don’t have sales experience, but I’ve been a PT since I’m 16 years old and had to get my own clients, I know what it means to be rejected as part of my (back then) role is to pitch new creative marketing campaigns to boards and the senior leadership team. I know what it takes to sell an idea because it’s all about rapport building.’

Boom – there it was. The first yes after a very long period of ‘no’s’ because I addressed the concern but also had a way to counter it with an approach how I can make it work.

Here are 2 other examples that might be of interest for you for an upcoming important meeting

• You are suggesting a costly new program to your boss and can already see the ‘no’ written in his eyes. How you can reverse the pitch is: “You may be thinking, 'we don't have enough money'. If I can have a few moments of your time, I'll point out where we can find that money and make it back in the first three months.”

  • This immediately addresses the concern but also offers a solution and let me tell you – this is when people are all ears 

• You are suggesting a new membership or partnership program to your board, when a similar program failed the year before: “You may be thinking, 'we tried this before and it didn't work'. You're right, and I've identified where we went wrong last time and how we can prevent that from happening this time.”

  • Same thing here: You’ve shown initiative and already identified a reason why the idea couldn’t move forward. If there are logical reasons and ways to avoid those mistakes in future, the chances are a lot higher to get a yes.

Tip #6 – Don’t contradict your partner

What’s important to remember is that sometimes, when we get a ‘no’, we put our back hair up to defend ourselves by trying to prove the other person wrong and justify ourselves. And as you can imagine, this can backfire because it comes across as too pushy and invested in your own agenda only. And that’s not a good sign.

For example, if you’re trying to pitch for a new idea and your decision maker clearly has a problem with their budget, it’s not a good idea to say: “but, this idea has the potential to help you make you more money and cut your other costs!”

Don’t contradict your decision maker when they say that they’re strapped for cash. It’s much better to say something along the lines “I understand that and that’s the reason why I’m suggesting this [idea/ agency/ product/ software] you name it] as it can help you cut costs as well as bring back your investment (and even more) in the first 3 months by [their benefit].”

Tip #7 – Be mindful with your words

Words are powerful as tip #6 just showed so being very mindful which words you choose and when can also make or break the deal.

What you always want to keep in mind is that the end goal is to build common ground and create a collaborative environment, aiming for a win-win situation and not animosity. And that starts already with how you get your point across.

For example: 

The word “can’t” builds the latter. 

Saying something "can’t" be done usually inspires the other person to think of all the ways it indeed can be done. And that is exactly the opposite of what you want to achieve.

Same goes with ‘but’ because that means you’re disagreeing with what has been said. Instead try ‘and’ in the sentence.

 

Tip # 8 – Understand When It’s Time to Move On

No matter how much you try and come prepared, sometimes the timing or setting just isn’t right.

And that’s OK. You shouldn’t beat yourself up or feel like a failure.

The trick is to get over it and stop wasting your time on something that’s clearly not going to happen.

And you’re right. I’m telling you that sometimes it’s perfectly fine to say goodbye to an opportunity. If you don’t hear from someone after 30 days, that opportunity is probably dead.

The best part is that you’re not simply walking away from that opportunity – you can try and re-engage them after a certain period of time, but with a new approach. Many things can change within that time frame: their budget might increase, someone on the team could leave, they win new clients, and the timing might be right. So, when you approach this decision maker again, start from the square one, meaning that finding out where they are and what they’re most wanting at that stage should be the first phase. 

This is also why it’s so important to be and stay graceful and respectful. Never burn bridges when it isn’t necessary because it’s a small world we live in and people know people. So even if you never come across this person again, it can still come back to you negatively if you’ve pushed the conversation or relationship too far.

A ‘no’ in the end is just like a current temperature check – that doesn’t mean it stays like this forever.

Now over to you – have you ever been able to turn a ‘no’ into a ‘yes’?

Or do you have another way to make an objection an opportunity? I’d love to hear from you! Because as we know- we can go a lot further together when we learn from and with each other which is also why I’d love to see you joining the Future of Work Campus. As I said – you can join now anytime and also month to month so that if you can truly say being part of this community doesn’t energise you to be and do better, doesn’t equip you with the right skills so you can get ahead in the competitive world of work, that you aren’t connecting to people who support you to reach the next level or – for whatever reason – you can cancel anytime.

Sounds like a deal? 
I can’t wait to see you in there!