The Wisdom Transition - Navigating Change At Work

Petra:

Hey there, and welcome to another future of work campus industry Insider. I'm so excited to talk about today's topic, because it's a topic that we all need to get better at. And this is change and transition, especially over the last year or so we've seen such a fast track of change in every single industry and professional, and we are joined by somebody who has made transition and change her life. 

Cheryl Benedict is our guest today, not only on a podcast, but she's also going to be our industry Insider for the month of July in the future of work campus to talk through how we can manage change better, what are those signs that we are going to enter transition, and of course, how we can make the best out of these changes. So with no further ado, shall welcome.

Cheryl:

Thank you. Thank you, Petra, it's wonderful to be with you.

Petra:

I was so excited about today's topic and conversation because we have been introduced by a mutual connection. And when I saw your specialization and the book that has been in the making for 30 years, I was like we need to have shall other podcasts

in the future for campers, because

we need to spread your message. Now for those who haven't come across you. Can you quickly introduce yourself? Who are you? What are you doing? And how did you get to where you are now?

Cheryl:

I'd love to

So looking back on my career, I recognize that almost everything has had to do with helping clients with change and transition. I started as a outplacement consultant career counsellor that's certified to become an executive coach, and a leadership consultant. So really feels like the whole 30 years of my career have been devoted to becoming a student of change. And understanding that when there's a major change that occurs to us externally, it triggers this internal psychological emotional process called transition. And that's what my book is all about.

Petra:

Oh, this is so exciting. And even though we've been talking about change for the last decade, and the same goes, the only constant is change. The real transitions have only taken place probably in the last 12 months or so, due to COVID-19 that everything is already here. We've been talking about the future of work and having more careers and professions than ever before. But now all of a sudden, it's already reality, and it has obviously impacted a lot of professionals. Can you talk through a little bit about the changes that you've seen, especially over the last 12 months?

Cheryl:
Absolutely. Well, the probably the most profound one, with the folks that I coach was, at least in the States, the lockdown, you know, March 15th, hit, and everyone had to work from home. And nobody had the technical capabilities to pull off a monitor and a printer and, and a decent keyboard and, and everything else it takes to work from home. 

So I would say that was the first major change. And then and then I'm seeing organizations now grapple with what's the new normal, like we got hit way worse than you guys, you were credibly smart. When it came to COVID. 

We sucked in America, obviously, if you're reading any of the news, so now organizations are wanting to bring people back. But people have gotten so used to working from home, they're like, I don't know if I want to, like I kind of love not having a commute. I kind of love getting to wear pyjama bottoms. 

When I work, I kind of love getting to hang out with my family and go for walks with my dog. I don't know if I want to trade that back in to going back to sitting in a cubicle or sitting in an office where there's so much time that's wasted. 

So it's really interesting looking at the hybrid model where some organizations are thinking, I wonder if we could allow people to work from home two days a week, but still provide occupancy for them at work. 

And I think a lot of organizations are trying to figure that out.

Petra:

Yes, for sure. Because they have to all of a sudden, we don't have to work with global local talents, we can tap into a global talent pool and also at the same time, we can save on office space, yes and rent. Because we don't have to have the overheads but at the same time, a lot of companies who are also work with the word and are still concerned about the culture, does it change the culture? 

Can you talk a bit through how companies are going through those transitions and changes or what's the best way to manage these now?

Cheryl:

Most organizations I worry that I work with are worried about culture, especially the ones that are employee owned, that they've invested greatly in the employees recognizing that they are the most important resource, the most important asset. 

And I think most of the companies I work with are well, they went through a lot of grief and sadness, with people not coming into work. And now, they worry, will they ever come back. 

So one of the conversations I've been having with some of the most important clients that I work with, is the memory of when I lived in Ireland for three years in my late 20s. And I remember being an expatriate going through all of that shift living in a different country. But you know, you get your sea legs, and you're and you're just fine. 

But something about the idea of repatriating moving back seemed like something I wanted to really resist, like, I did not want to move back to the States. I wanted to stay in Ireland, or continue being an expatriate. 

I remember thinking, Wow, it's a real deal. Once you're used to your new environment, the idea of repatriating back. It's, it's fraught with peril. And I think we resist it. 

So one of the things I've been recommending is, could you instil a two month return to work? Where everyone comes back catches up on what's been going on? How are you doing? How is your life changed? get used to that again. And then, after two months of being repatriated, then decide, how often am I going to come physically to work? How often am I going to work from home, but then you can make a fairer decision.

Because I think if we make the decision while working from home, with our bunny slippers, and our pyjamas on, none of us are gonna want to return because we're so used to working from home now. 

Petra

I think that's one way to attempt to look at how can we touch back into the culture, there's so many organizations have devoted, so much of their life led to love this approach, because it's basically saying you can dip your toes in the water without having to jump straight away. And this is also the easiest and a little bit, most soothing way, probably because you can experience it rather than having to make a decision based on logical thinking. And we get never the clarity that we need by thinking about anything.

Right has to be a felt experience.

Cheryl:

I agree. 

Petra:

Last year, we didn't have the opportunity to experience it, because we just had to do things differently. And, you know, look at it, everything works. And, you know, it was probably a little bit of a roller coaster beginning, but everyone found their feet and their new reality. And now it's not new anymore. It's just reality, which you know, it's great. And it goes to show people can adjust when they have to. 

Cheryl:

That's right. 

Petra

But having said that, so we need to not change. And they don't want to have the transformational transition happening to them. Because it's also a bit daunting to go through those changes. 

Can you talk through a little bit how we can manage change, but especially from a personal perspective?

Cheryl:

Absolutely, I think that there's something powerful about naming the fairly predictive phases that we go through, when there's a major external change. It's one of the reasons why I wrote the book. 

When there's a major external change, it triggers this often unwanted, unexpected, internal psychological process that, that I've termed a transition that always begins with the ending of something, none of us like endings. I mean, we associate endings with, with loss and with grief, and it'll never be the same again. 

And I didn't ask for this, I didn't want this Come on. But when there's an ending that we have no control over, we're thrust into all of the emotions that go with it. And something about I feel, being able to name it helps to neutralize it. So it doesn't take us over. 

What I mean by that is knowing that when there's when there's a major change, that it's probably very likely that we'll experience a feeling of ending and a sense of shock. Like, wait a minute, I didn't ask if I don't want this. I'd like to, I'd like to not own it for a while I'd like to keep it at bay. 

And then I think very naturally there's a sense of denial and anger, wanting to blame someone else make it their fault. Worry sadness.

And I think that the most important thing probably one of the reasons I wrote the book, is that what I've discovered with clients going through change, especially clients that are resisting it is that they discover that they're not on top of their game. I think that's why we hate it so much. 

Because it's as if 40% of us has gone on holiday. And we're left with just 60% of us to navigate our life. Because that 40% is worried about our safety, that 40% is scanning the landscape for what shoe is going to drop next. 

So we're trying to operate with 60% of us. And that's deeply disorienting, it can cause a loss of memory, harder to concentrate harder to, to feel engaged. Often a proverbial sense of crankiness. And I didn't ask for this, it's not fair. So I feel like just being able to name it. To be able to say, you're in the midst of transition, my friend, expect to not be on top of your game. 

Expect at times to feel like a dithering idiot. Expect to do stuff that is mortifyingly embarrassing, and you wonder what's wrong with me? 

Expect that so that you don't then internalize it, think there's something wrong with you. It's actually it's actually the psychological terrain of being in transition. And I think that we know that. So we resist that. 

Like, I don't want to go through that. I don't want to feel like I'm not on top of my game. I think that's why long-winded answer to your question. 

Petra:

That I think that's why many of us resist it, because we don't want to go through that. We don't want to go through that.

And you know what, I think you hit the nail on its head, because you also said, People don't feel in control over this change, and often change and transitions happen to us. 

It's not something that we proactively initiate because when we do when we say we want to resign from an organization, or we want to, you know, split up in our relationship, it's initiated, we can prepare for this, right. 

Whereas if we get made redundant, if we get replaced, if we get ditched by our partner, it means it's an ending for us. And he also said, it's usually connected with something negative rather than something positive. 

Before we started, recording, we were also talking about, you know, a little bit about my background, and I mentioned that I was transitioned, I never planned to change my career and professional that also hit me, because it was so unexpected. 

I didn't have a plan B. 

And now more and more, people have to be more proactive, because we're not changing jobs more frequently, but also entire careers, thanks to technology. 

You're working with executives and senior leaders quite a bit. And when those professionals have been in their industry, or even in their job for 10 2030 plus years, there's often also a sense of belonging, or that identity becomes their job title. 

Then all of a sudden, they're gone. Now, how can we better prepare ourselves and proactively initiate the change? 

Also, when it doesn't happen just yet, but are there any tips that you can share with us?

Cheryl:

Wonderful question. When I was a career counsellor, I learned I learned about this metaphor, borrowing the topic for next month, I learned the metaphor of a stovetop, is that how you say it in Australia? A stovetop, yeah. 

And so your normal job is on the front burner. So you've got a pot, it's boiling, you're caring for it, you're not abandoning it, you're making sure that everything is happening to that pot in the front. 

But if you can take a second pot and put it on the back burner, in that pot, you start to invest in yourself, and you start to dream up. 

·      What might I like to do next? 

·      And what courses do I need to take? 

·      What certifications do I need to get? 

·      What are the things that I can add to that part, so that I can eventually get it to a simmer, which means it's not boiling? 

It's not crazy or frenetic. 

But it's hot enough that it's simmering. 

And you're putting some of your lifeforce into it, you're loving it, you're caring for the second pot. Well, should you decide or get clear that the job you're in now the front burner is no longer serving you. 

Maybe it's no longer a fit, maybe you've outgrown it. Maybe you want to relocate or maybe you just feel this internal calling to do something else, well, then you can simply take the pot on the front burner, move it aside, move the pot on the back burner, bring it forward, it's already simmering, and it doesn't take much to turn up the burner to get it boiling. 

What I love about this is that you're taking impeccable care of yourself, and not finding yourself in this situation that you did where it's like, oh, no, I did not see this coming. What do I do where you're caught, unawares, you're preparing, and you don't ever have to do anything with the pot on the back burner. 

You can just continue to love yourself by gaining new skills and, and new competencies and, and maybe just for the sheer joy of it. So you don't ever have to make that shift. But if you need to, you're prepared. 

Don't you like that?

Petra

Oh, I love it. I don't just like it. I love it. 

And what a great metaphor, because it's such a vivid imagination also. And what it does is it makes you put you're getting into the position of power. 

You don't have to act out of fear and of those emotions. And you also mentioned before, often it's the emotions that take over and we just don't know what else to do. 

Everyone is scared of what's next can be paid a piece, do we lose the roof over our top? All those Yes, immediate reactions come to play. However, if you put the logic which are words, on top of those emotions, it's usually much easier to understand where we are at and then transition slowly into this next phase of it.

Absolutely. Do you did you study Maslow's hierarchy of needs when you were in school, I was a big one for me, as a psychology major. 

I remember bedrock is that sense of safety and security I can provide for myself, I can keep a roof over my head, I can provide meals I can make sure my creature comfort is taken care of. And there's nothing more debilitating than feeling like oh, no, that's been removed. Like the loss of income is terrifying to us, as human beings. So having strategies in place, so we're not left at the mercy of somebody else's decision making, I think is profound, especially when you're considering the future of work. And the many disruptions in the shifting landscape.

 How can we take control in a seemingly chaotic environment? I think that's really what you focus a lot in with the podcast I've seen and, and I appreciate that, because there's nothing worse than feeling like I was not prepared for this.

Petra:

Exactly. But this is also the reason why so many people get stuck where they are now because they are safe. 

They have met the first two basic needs. And they're not getting any further because they don't know what else is there. And you also said before, we need to be clear. So what would we want to do next. But people often don't have this vision. And if we don't have this bigger vision, we just get stuck because we're so paralysed by it not knowing it. 

Have you got an idea, a bit of a tip on how we can actually get to this vision as to what's next, especially if we are in an industry or profession for 10, 20 plus years, and we don't know anything else.

Cheryl:

Yeah, this is a this is a crazy idea. So bear with me. But one of my favourite things to do. And one of my favourite exercises to give people that I coach is to it's like a journaling exercise or almost like a guided visualization, where I asked them to connect to the feisty old lady or the feisty old guy that they'll become. 

So projecting their mind 20 years 30 years, however many years is realistic and imagining them kind of packing their bags for what's next, you know, towards the end of your life. And and to ask the question of 80 year old Petra, or 80 year old Cheryl, what is it about your life that you are so jazzed about? What are you so glad that you had the courage to do? 

What are the things looking back that that are the most meaningful to you now, as you reflect upon this entire beautiful life that you've lived? 

And sometimes you could ask that question and write it down with your dominant hand and it's trippy to have your non dominant hand respond.

You know, it's obviously not very legible, but it's really interesting what comes forward. And lots of times, the wisdom that ensues from dialoguing with your future self, you'll realize, wait a minute, she said that I would be owning my own business. 

And one of the things she was most delighted that I had the courage to do was to step out as an entrepreneur. I am not on track for that at all. And so that then leads to more self-reflection, maybe hiring a young analyst or a therapist or doing journal workshops or things where you can start to tap into the depths of wisdom that are already within you. 

I think that's one way to free ourselves from the entrapment of thank God, I have a job, I can pay the bills, but my soul is pining for something else, and I don't even know what it is. I think that's one interesting, curious way to get at that content. Have you ever tried that? Have you ever tried that?

Petra:

Yes, I'm a big visualization person that's died since I was little because I grew up with the power of the subconscious from the book from Dr. …

Cheryl:

Do you mean the novel, it's not Maxwell Maltz it is Psycho Cybernetics? The book was transformative for me. When I was a little girl. I took the course with my mom and stepdad when I was 13 by Maxwell Maltz Psycho Cybernetics. And so I'm all about vision boards, manifesting because I was trained in that methodology from 13 on I've never met anybody else who knows his work.

Petra

Yes, actually, this was the second book. The first one is Dr. Joseph Murphy, the power to subconsciousness and Psycho Cybernetics. I've only come across in my very first mastermind, it was probably six years ago now. But I've also read this book million times every coaching client gets this book because no way it is transformative. Yes, it is. 

Cheryl:

Absolutely.

There are no accidents. This is so synchronistic. I'm so excited about this save. But you know, this is also one of those human traits that can never be replaced. 

And this is imagination. And people think they're not creative. 

They can't imagine, this is where innovation happens when we can picture something that's not there yet. And this is transformative in so many ways. 

Petra

And also empowering was, oh my god, I could actually run a business or I could work for this organization or could become a speaker, whatever it might be, because in a second, you can visualize it, you can become it because then it's all about what other steps I need to take, I want to be a speaker, I cannot publicly speak that well, yet, I can get a coach, I can train it, I can record. 

So all of a sudden, we've got practical extra steps that get us closer to the goal. Beautiful. Love it. I love it. As I said, I love your work. I love your specialization, and your approach to it. Because this is honestly what every single person and of course, also every organization needs. Now looking forward to, you know, probably the next 12 to 24 months. What kind of changes are you foreseeing to come? 

How can we prepare ourself with what's next enter the changes in a turmoil that's upon us.

Cheryl:

So in my own little orbit, I'm, I'm getting increasingly clear that there's a second book in my future, but that it will come not just from me, but from other thought leaders throughout the land, you know, throughout the world, who have something to say about when transition becomes transformational. 

I am so intrigued with this. And, and I'm delighted that I don't feel like I have to have all the answers. 

I want to bring on amazing guests to this new podcast called the in between to find out what are the models of transformation that they have observed in their own life. For example, I want to have my husband talk about the hero's journey. What a gorgeous quest for transformation. 

I want Shakti Durga to talk about alchemy and how going into the alchemical fire. We emerge renewed, I went trace to talk about a Nona and how going through the gates of initiation underground allow us to centre gather ourselves in remerge fuller, brighter versions of ourselves. 

So that's what I'm intrigued about.

I would say that that's what we'll be seeing on my personal trajectory is leadership development programs. executive coaching, and the beginning of this podcast, which I think a couple of weeks away from show, it's pretty exciting.

Petra

Oh, it's so exciting. And I also love your approach to bring in different experts. 

Because when we talk about the future of work, the future of learning is learning with and from each other. There's not the sage from the stage, but it's the guide on the side.

That's exactly it and takes pressure off me. Because to write that book of mine, gosh, every Thursday, Friday, Saturday, half of Sunday, five months in a row. 

It's incredibly, an incredibly disciplined undertaking, and a labour of love, but somewhat lonely, really, to write a book. 

So the joy of getting to showcase other beloved's and where they can have a chapter devoted to them, I'm imagining how much fun would that be to pick up the book and turn to Petra read all about the wisdom that you can share? 

And then go, Oh, let me sink into that. Let me be with that. I'm pretty jazzed about it. I'm delighted to not have to be the sage on the stage.

Petra:

Love it, it you know, it's just a very different approach also, because you're the curator of thought leadership, but you bring it together to focus on this one topic. It's beautiful, and I can't wait to put me on the waiting list. 

Cheryl:

I'm gonna want you in the book.

Petra:

Are you kidding? Look forward to being a chapter. erasing well put me on a waiting list anyway.

But speaking of we have, obviously your book, what is it called?

Where can everyone find it? Who is it for?

Cheryl:

So can I share a little bit about this story? 

I felt a sense of urgency to write it published January 2 2020, through Amazon. Two weeks later rushed into the emergency surgery. The last words I heard, were, ma'am, you need emergency surgery, and you may die. 

And in fact, I had a near death experience. Obviously, I survived. 

But it really made me realize that this book called ‘The wisdom of transition, navigating change’ and it doesn't just apply to work. 

It applies to emergency surgery, it applies to divorce, death, changes in every area of our life. And I got out, recovered, then COVID hit. 

And all of a sudden, my book took on international acclaim, it was so crazy. No wonder I felt such a sense of urgency to write it. I obviously had no idea what was gonna happen on a global level. 

But there were so many people who reached out and asked if I could do webinars and podcasts and talk about change and transition, as we as a, as a international community were grappling with how to navigate this change. 

And then it culminated December 5, with a sound advice Book Awards, nominating my book as one of 14 best new authors, and my book, one from 11 countries. 

So it was so cool. And I think it just has everything to do with timing, timing. 

So yeah, that's the story, the wisdom of transition, navigating change at work. Yeah, and I have a, I have a website, where you can go and download the change and transition model, which is kind of a cool thing to print. Stick on your bulletin board. 

There's also 20 gems of wisdom, basically 20 things that I was gobsmacked about the caveat of my book that I've thought would be fun to create as a free PDF. 

Petra:

Wow, what a story what a story that elevates the importance of getting onto this book and learning more about change and transition, even more so because things change so quickly, you know, redundancies, but also health issues, partnership or relationship issues. 

We just don't know what's around the corner so that we just, you know, prepare for it and, you know, manage it correctly, the better way or off for not just ourselves but also for our loved ones and for everyone who we can impact. Well said, Cheryl, thank you so much for being today's guest and obviously our industry insider also fortune like to go even deeper into the topic of change and transition. 

Now, where can everyone find you obviously the website anywhere you would like people to connect with you to learn more about you?

Cheryl:

Yeah, so you can go to the wisdom of transition to learn about the book. You can go to morph consulting mo r f, as in Frank consulting, to learn all about that. 

The practice of what I do. So both of those are alive and well and cool websites.

Petra:

Excellent. Well, I'll put all of the links in the show notes that everyone can find you and connect with you and learn more about you. 

So thank you again for being today's guests and for the incredible work that you're doing. 

Cheryl,

Petra, Thank you. Thank you for having me. It's been an honour.