Why change is so hard (and what you can do about it)
When do you feel most alive?
Usually when you achieved something that was bigger than you and you thought was possible.
This is why everyone talks about finding your purpose, your drive and energy for greatness in life when you're clear about what legacy you want to leave behind.
However, this topic is a tricky one.
And one you might be sick of by now as it floats around everywhere.
However, it's also an important one as this is where finding your purpose and with that drive for excellence comes from.
This is what all high achievers have in common: working towards contributing to something bigger than themselves.
So far so good - but here is the tricky part:
👉 On the one side, you want to be remembered for something big and remarkable.
👈On the other hand, it's also often daunting because it seems too big and with that, impossible.
When something seems too far away from where we are now, the most common reaction is standstill and resignation - not even trying to tackle it.
It's honourable to want to leave a massive legacy behind, like Elon Mask and all his revolutionary solutions.
However, not many realise that leaving any type of legacy behind means some type of change because something that bothered us triggered us to change our approach to it.
This is now where the hard work starts and where the sh** hits the fan:
CHANGE
Nothing great comes from doing the same average thing over and over again.
In fact, the most significant moments in our lives we remember and would recall to be the most defining ones for who we are happen between being 15-30 years - because that's the time when we do something for the first time.
It's called the reminiscence bump.
The older we get, the more routines we have in our lives and we have fewer of those firsts.
However, this is where people get trapped in a rut, go through the motions and lose the drive and excitement for everything.
It's because those moments don't happen naturally anymore that often to us but the magic is in CREATING those moments as this is when we continue to grow and feel being in flow.
We feel most comfortable when we feel certain.
But we feel most alive when things are not.
But why is so hard to change habits and routines?
It's because of what happens on a cellular level and its misinterpretation - when we learn a new language, a new skill or work on improving ourselves - that makes people fall off the bandwagon.
It's all in the - not Psychology - but Biology of change ...
A biological process is going on inside of us - an emotional one when we try to introduce anything new to our lives.
But this part is also what trips people off and don't stick with the change for long enough to make it permanent.
Cells are receivers they constantly receive information and replicate themselves.
This is what's happening when we go through the process of change.
When we want to change a bad habit or go to the gym regularly or learn a new skill, we are sending positive ju-ju (aka emotions) through the body.
They come in the form of hormones - dopamine and serotonin are the main ones.
However, if our body cells are used to receiving stress hormones - cortisol - because of the lifestyle we live, they want more of what they are used to and reject what they don't know.
When we stick with change, our body cells start replicating those cells - the dopamine and serotonin and want to have more of them as they replicate based on the last information they received.
Be aware that Self-sabotage comes in - for sure.
Let's say you want to start a new habit - let's say starting exercising (because this is a non-negotiable when I start working with new clients 😁).
When a stressed out couch potato starts exercising, the body cells start to receive dopamine and serotonin - the new hormones.
In order to receive them, they shake and vibrate to replicate themselves but also to accept the new information and change receptor side.
This vibration is what trips people off as its mostly interpreted wrong.
People interpret this feeling as 'it doesn't feel good' and keep saying it to themselves which forms their reality.
However, it is only their own story they attached to the cellular change that's happening.
The body (and mind) is programmed to stick to known habits as this is what have kept us safe and helped survive so far.
However, the biggest breakthroughs usually happens when we are close to quit.
Simply knowing what happens when we try to implement something new helps most people to relax into the change ahead and can prepare for what's to come.
This is how it usually goes when starting something anew routine, like exercise:
Day 1: Excited for the exercise ahead, new gear and easy to do.
Day 2: Still excited and easy, even a bit more confident as we know what to expect; potentially go a bit overboard as we are too excited
Day 3: feeling a bit achy, bit of resistance kicks in and it feels hard
Day 4: We really don't want to go to the gym, it all hurts too much
Day 5: it's all too hard and we just don't go anymore at all.
However, simply sticking to the new habits is where the magic happens:
Cells are getting used to receiving those new hormones - serotonin and dopamine and want more.
So we focus on getting more of those by doing more and more of those new things and less of the bad stuff - the cortisol.
The good news: our mind is programmed to keep doing more of something that makes us feel good and what's known to us.
So sticking to a new habit that releases the positive hormones is easy after it was hard.
What's next?
If you are ready to grow, want to challenge your status quo and trigger those situations that make you want to change, taking action is the biggest challenge.
Take the first step and start by getting to know you!
Our FREE Step-by-Step Guide to build your Personal Brand will help you with this first and biggest hurdle!
If you want to fast track those trigger situations and get clarity on the key moments that got you to where you are but don't let you get any further, book your FREE 45-min Strategy session to uncover!